Monday, April 30, 2007

Toby Update


Hello All,

At Mooki's request, today's update has a dual purpose to which I will add a third component. The first is to let you all know how Toby is doing and the second is a sort of pediatric oncology primer which will hopefully provide you with a better understanding of what Toby and family can expect over the course of Toby's treatment. In the last part of the update I will let you know how the various coordinators (Fran, Heather, Carie, and Rox) are working to make sure that everyone's good will and efforts are recorded and not overlooked. So here goes

1) Toby completed his first cycle of chemotherapy over the weekend. Aside from several episodes of vomiting, diarrhea, an upset stomach, and a fever, he did pretty well. In fact, today Toby is on his way home. This does not mean that "all is well" or that Toby is no longer sick, rather, that under certain stringent criteria, his treatment protocol (regimen) allows for him to be at home. This leads me to "purpose #2."

2) Pediatric oncology 101 - Toby's treatment protocol is lengthy and intense. Ideally its duration is approximately a year and three quarters, however, because of "bumps in the road" (that are almost guaranteed) such as infections that Toby might succumb to, "low counts" (see below), etc it is not uncommon for the treatment to extend longer than this. I alluded to the parts of Toby's treatment in my very first e-mail, but as a reminder these are intravenous chemotherapy (5-6 cycles, each separated by three weeks), surgery (after the 3rd chemotherapy cycle), immunotherapy (an antibody-mediated treatment that targets neuroblastoma cells, this is what Sloan specializes in) interspersed between all the other treatments and which lasts until day #586 of the protocol, harvest of Toby's stem cells (to be used only if necessary later in the treatment), radiation, oral chemotherapy, and another medication shown to be effective against neuroblastoma.

What Toby can expect following much of his treatment is that approximately 7-10 days after chemo and radiation his "counts" (white blood cells that fight infection, hemoglobin that delivers oxygen to the body's tissues, and platelets which clot the blood and prevent bleeding) will begin to drop. This means that he will be susceptible to infections and require periodic blood and platelet transfusions. When he is not admitted to the hospital for chemo or other treatment, he will have to come to the hospital for clinic visits. Initially, clinic visits occur daily. At the clinic Toby will have his blood drawn and after each chemo cycle, he will receive daily subcutaneous shots with something called G-CSF to boost his white blood cells. This can be quite painful. If at any time Toby gets a fever, he has to immediately come to the hospital for intravenous antibiotics and depending on his absolute neutrophil count or ANC (a subset of white blood cells responsible for fighting infection, especially bacterial infections) he may need to be readmitted to the hospital. Mooki asked that I be specific about actual numbers and while I am not familiar with Sloan's exact criteria I do know that most pediatric oncologists will admit a child for i.v. antibiotics with an ANC < 500 and will transfuse blood / platelets for a hemoglobin < 7 and platelets <20,000 respectively. The antibody treatment that Toby will receive, (called 3F8) is usually given as an outpatient (kids must come to the clinic once a day for several hours). The main side effect of 3F8 is pain.

While at home Mooki and Stephen will have to change Toby's broviac dressing three times a week (his central venous catheter - the i.v. through which he receives his medicines). In the early stages of treatment, this can be an anxiety inducing event for both kids and parents, not to mention at times quite discomforting for kids.

Toby's pain is much better than it was two weeks ago, but he is by no means pain-free. Once at home he will most likely still require oral (and possibly i.v.) pain medication. There are many "pain meds" that Toby can benefit from (codeine, morphine, not tylenol which can mask a fever or motrin that further decreases platelet counts) but they don't taste great and are associated with their own side effects (constipation especially).

One of the more important (and frustrating) aspects of Toby's current situation is the need to be hypervigilant concerning his risk of infection, which in kids whose immune system is compromised as a result of their treatment, can be life-threatening. What this means is that contact with anyone who is less than healthy is best avoided. Even what most people might consider inconsequential, like a common cold, runny nose or nagging cough can mean trouble for Toby. Because kids, even ones who are not sick, often exhibit many of these symptoms, Toby won't be able to spend time with his friends as readily as he would like.

I hope this helps you better appreciate what Toby, Mooki, Stephen, and Yoni are faced with. Now on to the final part of my update.

3) Thanks to the tireless work of Heather (Beansprouts), Fran (UJC), and Carie (PSJC) together with others (Rox from UJC) we have come up with a calendar. Each day, a different person has/will be on-call to help out in various ways. The calendar also elucidates who is providing meals (lunch/dinner), picking-up groceries, doing laundry, and being on "Yoni-call." Rather than contacting the various coordinators, each one of you can now access the calendar and include yourself to help out in whatever way you see fit at a time that is convenient for you. The calendar can be found by logging onto "google calendar" and entering mookilatte@gmail.com as the login and toby2007 as the password.

Once again, I want to thank you all for your help and support. Please know that we are awed by your kindness and willingness to be there for us.

Warmly,

Yoram

Sunday, April 29, 2007

Toby Update

on friday night and saturday morning i had a glimpse of my former life. a remarkable calm settled over toby about 6 hours after the last drops of chemo went into his system. his features softened, his eyes grew wide, the possibility of a smile played on his lips. and most of all i sensed relief washing over his small body. around 8 pm he said it was bedtime (good boy) and we somehow resurrected a bedtime ritual that has become difficult to maintain in the chaos of hospital life: toothbrush, no bath yet, but books and kisses goodnight. just as we were ready to turn off the light a magical vision appeared and the snack cart arrived. on friday nights volunteers at mskcc wheel around a 3-tiered trolley packed to the gils with candies, treats and all manner of sugary/salty loveliness. it felt like a dream as toby picked out popcorn, cheeze doodles, starburst, powdered donuts. he logically put them aside for "tomorrow" (good boy) and fell to sleep.

saturday morning we woke early and toby smiled and laughed as the sunlight came into our room. we played catch with a beanbag tiger, drank tea and then toby surprised me by stating that he wanted to go to the playroom. he moved easily from bed to floor and started walking down the hall as i struggled to keep up with him while pushing his "pole buddy"/massive iv pole. we spent almost 2 hours in the small play area, with toby making me eggs in the playkitchen, re-enacting a beansprouts day with the dollhouse and schoolbus, and playing a mean game of luckyduck.

we also received clearance from our docs to take him outside for an hour yesterday, the first time he has been outside since april 17. it was a beautiful day tinged with sadness. i sat in the wheelchair with toby on my lap and stephen pushed. the trees are still in bloom on the upper east side and we greedily took in the sights. toby marveled at the light breeze and told me suddenly that he ate some wind. he has lost 5 lbs, down to 39 lbs since we checked in.

at the playground i felt a shot of energy animate toby's body, so we stopped to check it out. and then we met up with our reality again. toby was tired, the swings and slide were off-limits, he valiantly attempted to jump through a hopscotch game and then leaned heavily against me crying that his stomach hurt. back to the chair to look at busses, taxes, numbers on street signs. and then back to the room where he was so tired that the rest of the day became a blur.


i need your help. we have been told that we need to find a new home for our 2 cats. they provide too much of a health risk for toby with his compromised immune system. this will be a very difficult transition, as both yoni and toby are very attached to bashevis and mushroom; they are a part of our family. but i need to find a home/fosterhome for the cats very soon. they are about 11 years old, both neutered males and they mainly eat and sleep. if anyone is willing to host them for about a year, please let me know.


i want to give a shout out to our incredible community of friends and family. yesterday i had some amazing home-cooked food for dinner. heather and jessica did shopping, coordinating and more, stephanie compiled a packet of support resources, sue oren came to visit, fran visited and delivered notebooks, david+betsy and grandmother+grandfather pannone sent gifts and love to toby. susan fox of parkslopeparents sent emails on our behalf. and saba and sabta unguru are with us always, sitting in the hospital room, cleaning the house, being there for yoni. i am scared of what will happen when you leave on may 5. my brother yoram spent the day at yoni's soccer game in prospect park yesterday before heading back to maryland. all of you are wonderful friends. we will need your continued strength and love as we navigate. thank you so much.

love, mooki

Friday, April 27, 2007

Hi All,

Toby completed his first cycle of chemo earlier today. His appetite is slowly improving too. For lunch, he had some cucumbers, applesauce, cherry ice, & a few fries.

Mooki & Stephen enjoyed lunch compliments of Heather & Jessica.

Toby did a great job getting his Broviac (central catheter) dressing changed. Mooki & Stephen are learning how to change the dressing so that once Toby's at home they'll be able to do it themselves.

Yoni came to visit today & got Toby to smile & even laugh - just what the Dr. ordered. Tomorrow, Mooki's hoping to get Toby cleaned-up, she's hoping for a shower, but will settle for a sponge bath.

One thing Mooki & Stephen are interested in is "Toby stimulation." If there's anyone out there who has a particular skill (balloon animals, etc) capaable of engaging a 3 year-old, please let us know.

That's all for know. Enjoy your weekend.

Yoram

Sloan's visitation policy.

Visitors must be older than twelve years-old, sign-in at the main desk at the entrance to the pediatric oncology unit, and be "healthy" (i.e., no cold symptoms, cough, etc). Touching base with Mooki or Stephen beforehand is a good idea too.

Toby received some tremendous gifts from his friends at Beansprouts. His doctors asked us to let everyone know that while gifts are always a good thing, as he becomes more susceptible to infection it's probably not a good idea for him to receive stuffed animal like-toys or used toys.

I will send out an update on Toby later today.

Yoram

More Toby (Lunches)

Good Morning Everyone,

Toby had a semi-rough night (vomiting, sweaty, and he spiked another fever). But Stephen, who stayed with him last night, tells us that Toby did ask for breakfast this morning and after yesterday's succesful encounter with food we're encouraged. The first cycle of chemo is complete today and until Toby's "counts" (his white blood cells, hemoglobin, and platelets) drop over the next 7-10 days, my guess is that he should feel better at least today and tomorrow.

As many of you know, our parents are here from Israel, helping out in any way they can. They're a source of both moral and practical support and along with all of your help, we're very thankful. My mom is most at home in the kitchen and until their departure on May 5th dinners are covered (although tonight and tomorrow Heather has arranged for dinners).

Where Mooki, Stephen, and Yoni could really benefit from everyone's gastronomic generosity is with dinners once our parents depart, but especially with lunches even starting now. As a result of the controlled chaos in the hospital, Mooki and Stephen often times either miss lunch altogether or end-up eating a not too pleasant hospital lunch around 16:00. If there is anyway to make sure that they can count on a lunches I know they would be truly appreciative.

Knowing that you all have Toby and his family in your thoughts and actions is an enormous relief for me, especially when I am back in Maryland.

Please know that without your help and kindness these horribly tragic times would be all the much harder.

Warmly,

Yoram

Toby Update



hi everyone,

i don't know if it's the gray skies today or the fear of what happens over the next few days as we wait for toby's counts to inevitably fall, but i'm feeling anxious this morning.

toby finishes his first round of chemo at 1 pm today and we have been told that he will probably regain his appetite, have more energy and feel better for a few days. i want to embrace that information. but am having a hard time feeling positive.

i slept at home last night while stephen stayed at the hospital with toby. we take turns. coming back to brooklyn is definitely a recharge, but is emotionally very difficult for me. all of toby's things are around me but toby isn't here. his life in the hospital and for the next year or more will be so different from anything we have ever experienced. i mourn for my smiling, garrulous, active and inquisitive little boy. yesterday toby spent almost the entire day in bed, watching tv and it's something i feel we need to work on. he is not interested in leaving the sterile environment of his room to visit the playroom or go down the halls or talk to people. and i know i may be hoping for too much too soon, but it is still hard to bear when i look at my beautiful child and see his pain. how can we enrich his life when his favorite things are riding his tricycle on the ring road, going to the transit museum, baking cookies, riding the trains and busses, going to beansprouts?

many of you have sent toys and books. thank you so much; we are using them, although the last 2 days toby has really only found comfort in the tv. if you visit, i urge you to be upbeat, talk directly to toby, ask him questions about trains and elevators, tell him crazy things that happened to you on your way to work. if anyone has suggestions for how to make a kid's life in the hospital easier, please let me know.

on a positive note, toby had his first food in 11 days yesterday. stephen and i have been careful about not eating too much in the room, because chemo makes kids extremely sensitive to smells and we didn't want toby throwing up more than he has been, or associating food with feeling sick. but yesterday it was 3 pm and we realized we hadn't eaten, so we ordered some pasta and sauce and salad with grilled chicken. when it arrived we put it on the ledge out of sight and toby suddenly said "i want turkey, i'm hungry" (!?). we managed to put together a quick plate of grilled chicken, applesauce, some potato chips. amazingly he ate, didn't throw up, and was happy.

randy sang a song about a loquat tree on the roof yesterday and i will keep that in my mind as a beacon of warm, summery, sticky hope.

i'll have more info on donating blood for toby soon. love to you all,
mooki

Thursday, April 26, 2007

Hello Friends of Toby,


I am happy to be writing to you from Toby's room.

Toby is nearing the end of his first round of chemo & so far he's doing fairly well aside from a few expected "bumps in the road."

Even though the first round of chemo is almost over, for now, Toby's Drs might want him to remain at Sloan for the next couple of weeks.

Today, Randy was here & put on quite a show for Toby. He sang & played his guitar & was a big hit.

I want to extend our thanks to each of you for your ongoing support, meals, toys, laundry, shopping, etc...

I will be here for the next few days & will do my best to send regular updates.

Yoram